...-itz over i think-...

i feel happier now, of sorts. its amazing how the words "love you b" can anger someone in an instant. deep down i know whud i decided is for the best, but why does it still hurt. you mean nothing to me yet it seems like your everything. you cant decide but yet i still suffer. i promised not to cry, still tears threaten to fall. you constantly do this. you make all the effort in the beginning, but it dies off when i show interest. i think this pain i always feel is specially reserved for you, cuz only you can evoke it. i think i did successfully move away from you, but you came back, and now you're leaving again. my heart tells me to stay, but my brain, the only logical side of me is telling me to get the fuck away from you. i saw you today, and for the life of me i wanted to tell you all this, but i didnt. i keep it inside me, and it eats me everyday, every hour, every minute, every second. you dont call no more. you dont msg. even with all these signs, i still have that little hope. i know i shouldnt, but i do. you have that effect on me, and i know you know. you use it to your advantage and i hate you for it. you lied to me. plain and simple. at this point i dont know the truth but i feel you lied, you asshole. come back home and then we'll see. i still feel like fuck. im frustrated with all this xtra shyt i hafta deal with. i dont need the drama.

- get the fuck outta my life -